you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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