i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
