All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize