he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
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