look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
