hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
