I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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