that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
