Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Randomize
