I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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