You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
