What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
