I'm really into asian looking animals
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
