that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
