i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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