I'm lost and stupid without you.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
