Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize