dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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