youre lurking in front of me
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
