too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
