if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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