Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
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