Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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