I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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