No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
