sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
