Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
