Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Randomize
