Whoa Z and x make the same sound
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
we're so committed to being not committed
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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