you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Randomize
