Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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