Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
