I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
