are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
