allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
