how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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