I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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