I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
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