And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Randomize
