We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
