me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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