I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
