it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
