I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize
