just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
