Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
false alarm. still invincible.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
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