I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
We are two peas in an std pod
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
