Duck Duck Cougar?
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
