Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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