See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
