I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
