Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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