I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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